I feel like a total stranger here on DeviantART. I'm not very active, I don't submit much work and I actually suck at getting personal work completed! In fact, it is something that I have been struggling with during several of the past years and which I think has been very evident. It's 3:05 a.m. and I should be fucking sleeping but no, I'm here awake because today I felt like coming here to see what's new, respond to a few messages and update my journal with a relevant entry. I will be honest, I kind of don't like DeviantART anymore and there is something that keeps me away from coming here to just at least lurk and see what other artists are doing but I can't put my finger on what it is exactly. I feel so distant from all of this hence I have lost interest but that lack of interest might have been triggered (i think) because I am an artist working as a web designer and you might have heard how an artist who likes to draw and paint can become frustrated from working on web design which is so unrelated from creating the type of imagery a concept artist or illustrator would do. Unfortunately my responsibilities do not allow me to take some time to work on personal artwork. I have tried but have failed miserably many times. My brain is just left with absolutely no energy so when I get home from work I really do not want anything to do with Photoshop and on weekends all I really want to do is take a break from computers so I try to avoid my computer as much as I can and if I use my computer, I won't open Photoshop to draw. Anyways, I can tell you that deep inside of me I am actually genuinely interested in creating new art so I really need to get lots of shit sorted out so I can find the time to do my stuff!
2015 I want it to be the year I fucking push myself into achieving many things. But life's a bitch so I know it won't be that easy. I know for sure there will be obstacles and a bunch of crap I will have to fight and deal with to achieve my goals but if there is something I have always done in my life is to be perseverant so I want to try harder this year.
Anyways, enough of this. Time to go to bed.